Thursday, November 13, 2008

Well I weighed myself *L*

I have avoided the scale for a l-o-n-g while.
Last night I offically document that I weigh 200 lbs.
Two hundred jiggly puffy pounds. I might also go ahead and confess that I prefer elastic waist pants . If you choose 16W petite then you are as wide as you are tall.

I have the occasion to talk to many many women in the salon and the complaints I hear are so familiar. You really can't tell people the truth, they know the truth but avoid it. Oh my back is killing me..hummm well your belly is too big. Oh my feet are killing me...hummm your asking your regular size feet to hold up a irregular size body. I don't really eat that much.....yeah but Little Debbie snack cakes are not real food. I use the excuses myself and I KNOW better.

I am one of those folks that say things like I use to bench 135 or I used to squat 185. USE to, not now, not any more. I used to be a certified aerobics instructor, it took me 3 months to study for that test. I was so proud. But you cannot underestimate life and emotional events. They can take anything you have achieved and shake it's foundation seriously.

I think what I have learned is that you have to protect yourself from yourself. I have to understand my weaknesses. Take a hard look at myself and admit my flaws. That may take a while......
At my age you either wake up and get busy or get ready for medicine and doctor visits. I feel an urgency for clarity.

I love my nephew, he is encouraging his dizzy Aunt( me) to get real.


Jeff said...

Welcome to blogland, Memmy.

Seems like you have a totally different perspective that many of us fat or formerly fat folks -- you were once what we all strive to become. You know what it's like to be that person and, putting all of the excuses behind, you know you can get back there, and you will.

I look forward to sharing your journey.

Aaron said...


So much honesty and clarity today. I have to agree with the notion of "you have to protect yourself from yourself"...I am trying to turn that into "you have to protect yourself from your older self" -- old is relative -- for me it is still only a few months but I look forward to answering YES! to the following question:

Were you ever really that fat???

Keep it up! We'll have to do a 5K together on our next visit.